Lucubratrix

Things I Want To Do, But Can't

This weekend, I think I will go to Home Depot and buy a hose. Then I will tie one end of the hose to a cinderblock. Then I will heave the cinderblock through the window of that house down the street where the students live, together with a note telling them to wash up the vomit from the sidewalk.

Of course, I won't actually do that. It's nice to think about, but it's one of those things best left to one's imagination, along with my idea of sitting at a particular intersection with a basket of eggs, egging each car that runs the stop sign. (I would need a lot of eggs.) Come to think of it, there are plenty of things that are fun to imagine but impractical to execute, and they don't all involve taking vengeance on drunken undergrads and incompetent drivers.

For example, when I was little, I wanted more than anything to be either a paleontologist or an astronaut. I would still jump at the chance to do either. The problem is that it would involve a radical change from my current career path. I've invested too much money in my education in international relations to go and spend more so I could do a spacewalk or dig up dinosaur bones. It's a shame, though, that our childhood ambitions fade like that. And they usually do. There are an awful lot of office managers in the world, and my guess is that very few of them played Replacing The Toner or Writing Condescending Notes To Staff To Be Posted In The Break Room when they were kids.

It's not that I dislike the path I've chosen. I liked it enough to go to grad school and immerse myself in questions about international security. It's just that it'd be pretty cool to go dig up a T-Rex or be the first person to walk on Mars. I guess the moral is to follow your dreams, even if they may seem impractical.

So, with that in mind... how much do hoses cost, anyway?

posted by Just Me @ 19:15